* Everything I say here is my opinion. I do not claim to be right nor do I claim to be fully educated about these issues. I am merely presented only a brief synopsis of my views regarding these topics. *
A week or so ago I was at a local library’s annual used book sale. The books for sale were divided into sections and every section was labeled. There was autographed books, nonfiction, fiction, computer, history, health, and one section I found … well, disconcerting would probably be the appropriate descriptor of my feelings. Women’s issues. Why did that bother me so much?
This is how I see it, my so-called thesis of this little write up. By pointing out differences, it only serves to perpetuate them. I understand there are biological differences between genders, races (though I have yet to see definitive data on this) and other classifications we might make. I am not debating that at all.
What I am debating is the constant need and desire of certain groups to say that their issues are more important than another’s issues. Admittedly, certain groups have been oppressed historically and in some regards continue to be oppressed, but I feel that oppression stems from the fact we as people continue to reinforce and perpetuate differences that are surface level differences at best.
Vocal minorities (or sometimes majorities) shout from the mountain tops whenever they feel they are being discriminated against and yet when the reverse occurs and the newly “discriminated” against party vocalizes this, they are shot down. All discussion stops. They are instantly wrong and nobody questions it. Well, I’m here to question it.
Simply put – where was the men’s issues section? Or better yet, where was the people’s issues section? Because in the end we are all one people. We are all human. It’s a terrible thing to say, but we all suffer the same fate. Death. At the end of our lives, we are all the same. We return to the Earth and become part of the cycle of life. I know we perhaps don’t like to think about that in the bright moments of our lives, but it is possibly important to remember when we find ourselves fighting and quibbling over differences that in my mind aren’t important in the long run.
I now bring up one example I’ve noticed recently. The culture of rape and violence. I work in a domestic violence courtroom and have seen some terrible things. I’ve seen mothers beat up on daughters, husbands beat up on wives, wives beat up on husbands, roommates beat up on roommates, and so much more. The constant thread throughout all I have witnessed is very simple – violence and abuse knows no gender boundaries. It can happen to anyone and be committed by anyone. To say that men are always the aggressors does men and women a disservice. It instantly presumes guilt, something our American legal system rejects from the start. Moreover, it reinforces the incorrect view that women are always victims. It relegates women to a lesser standing and forces them into a box where they are the weaker gender. This is not so and I ardently fight against that belief any way I can.
Women don’t “ask for it” by dressing “provocatively.” Men don’t have sex on their mind all the time. To presume men are inherently sexually violent creatures who “can’t help it” is to discount self control, intelligence and morals we all should have. I find it disconcerting whenever I read comments about saying any of these things. Comments such as those only serve to further the culture of violence. It reinforces age old views and does not move humanity forward.
Perhaps I am not a good modern feminist. Perhaps I draw my views from a male-dominated patriarchal society where women will always be second class citizens. I call bullshit on that. A good feminist isn’t one who raises women up only to put men down. A good feminist espouses the views that women are equal to men. No single person is better or worse than another. We are all on the same footing. No one difference should separate us into groups.
I challenge you to look to the person on your left and then look to the person on your right. At our basest levels, we are all the same. One brain, one heart, one body. Everything else we may see is merely a product of our own personal perceptions. Love your fellow human being as if you would love yourself. Only when the world and all inhabitants of this world take that belief and make it their own will we see true and lasting peace and an end to violence of any type.
